(Back to Rant Central)
<![CDATA[
From: Karl Fogel
To: Lefty
Cc: Greg Gallagher, Ben Collins-Sussman,
Bryan O'Sullivan, Red Bean Cooks
Subject: Re: Ah, DSL (not)
Date: 23 Oct 2000 08:09:40 -0500
You think you had a bad DSL install experience?
Let me tell you how bad it can be.
An uncle placed an order for me as a gift, shortly before I was born.
When I entered first grade, my parents got a call from Telegronics,
who were branching out of the rural post delivery business into data
networking, informing us that we would soon receive a call from
*their* provider, TriState Coal and Magnetism.
I think we had just moved from Syracuse to New York City when TriState
finally called. Fortunately, they also provided in the city, although
our immediate ISP would no longer be Telegronics, but The New York
Baud Lair. It was nice to feel so taken care of, although NYBL
apparently turned out to be a bunch of long-haired hipsters who were
more into the possibilities of global communications networks than
actually configuring their machines. This was just hearsay, though --
it never really affected my family, since TriState couldn't do
anything until they got line confirmation from AT&T, who around this
time were broken up by Judge Harold Greene. Simultaneously, we moved
to Washington D.C., where an affiliate of TriState promised to take
over the account. By the time we got the call from them, four years
later, we were packing to move to Chicago.
In Chicago, I decided to start all over, with FlashCom. To my
surprise, FlashCom already had full records of the account and said
that (via Northpoint Communications) an order was "in the system" with
Ameritech, who had correctly anticipated our move to Chicago and made
sure to take the relevant files with them from AT&T. They didn't call
them Ma Bell for nothing, I guess.
Pleased by the level of customer service I'd received so far, I waited
for the technician to come install the DSL line.
About ten years later, as I was leaving college, DSL was invented,
which raised my chances of getting service considerably. Throughout
college, and then when I was in Bloomington with JimB, I'd always had
some degree of non-DSL connectivity anyway, so I didn't really feel
deprived. It was entirely justifiable that Ameritech gave priority to
other customers not as lucky as I, really.
After that, I lived abroad for a year; although Ameritech didn't call
during that year, I feel sure that that was because they knew I
wouldn't be around for the appointment anyway. Who can blame them?
My theory was confirmed by a call from them shortly after I got back.
The Baby Bells, they really watch out for you, just like Ma Bell used
to! We scheduled an appointment for a particular day between 8am and
5pm. Soon it was the day before The Day. As was customary, I quit my
job, spent everything I had on canned goods, and settled in to await
the technician.
I think I was down to the last can of refried beans, and was about to
call a friend to replenish my supplies, when the phone rang. It was
the Ameritech technician (I was sure glad I hadn't called that friend
-- then my phone would have been busy and he would have gone on to his
next appointment, in Nome, Alaska!), confirming that I was home.
Eagerly I panted in the affirmative, although I think he was a little
put off by my voice: I hadn't spoken a word in six months, so I
sounded a little rusty. But those technicians are made of tough
stuff, and he arrived undaunted a mere three days later. I managed to
buzz him in and open the front door before collapsing from starvation.
After I gnawed on some spare line from his bag, my strength was
restored, and we went together down to the basement, where he flipped
open a box, peered inside, then shut it and attached a yellow tag to
the access panel.
"You're all set. The line was ready all along. I don't know why they
sent me out here."
The next day FlashCom gave me an IP address, and I've been up 50% of
the time ever since.
-K
]]></plaintext></body>